The major goal of some divorcing couples seems to be revenge at any cost. These people appear unable to speak civilly to each other, much less able to discuss differences and mediate issues; sometimes they actively work to undermine each other, stall or engage in other bad behavior.
Couples obtaining divorces using the two-attorney adversarial process spent 134 percent more in total fees than couples using comprehensive divorce mediation to resolve all issues. This study was conducted with comparing groups that did not differ in complexity of divorce, marital conflict, anger at spouse, anticipated disagreement, or household income.
Many adversarial couples not only create a poisonous atmosphere but often ratchet up attorneys’ fees. Family law attorneys often charge more than $350 an hour, may want a $10,000 retainer (renewable when depleted, naturally) and charge you 15 minutes of billable time for reading one short email.
Sometimes attorneys also engage other experts, such as business valuation specialists, pension evaluators, certified public accountants, investigators and career and vocation evaluators, among others. Fees can mount up.
If money issues are all you have to work out between you and your spouse, you may want to consider working with a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst™ (CDFA™) or Divorce Financial Planner to iron out these issues. If you both can come to agreement on your own then you eliminate the need for much of the drama and trauma of divorce.
When you engage a non-acrimonious process, and collaboratively progress through your divorce you will see lower costs, better relationships moving forward, and a better, more strategic outcome overall.
